So, if you know me at all, you’ll know that I have a minor stuttering problem. It can get worse if I’m stressed out or frustrated, but for the most part I try to keep it hidden.
Anyway, because of this, I’m honestly really nervous about teaching. Mainly because my voice is supposed to be so important in what I do. I also know that Koreans are very much about appearance and that sort of thing…so I’ve also been nervous that I’ll end up getting fired or something because of it. 😦 😦 😦 What a shitty reason to get let go from a job.
I checked (again) on therapy and my insurance covers a whole 2 (TWO) doctors here in the St. Louis area (out of a few thousand) that specialize in speech therapy. One lady charges like $300/session and it’s a 12 week session…uh…I don’t have 12 weeks or $300. So..I guess I’ll have to just chance the whole thing.
I’ve been thinking on this since I accepted the job, and thought more of it just now when I called the nearest police station to see if they did fingerprinting for visas. (I need a second set to get another background check. Hoo.rah. And the other place I went to last time said you’re supposed to go to your city’s dept…whoops. ah well.) Anyway, apparently they don’t.
I’m just…frustrated. I wish I could talk like a regular person. My friends that know me would probably say that you can barely tell (because I work to hide it) or that they don’t notice it…and it’s not all that frequent…it’s just that it’s a constant struggle…for me. Not being able to get out what you want to say, when and how you want to…it sucks. It’s nice living around people though who already know about it, so I don’t have to keep explaining myself or apologizing. Oh and yeah, when people think it’s some sort of joke or something I’m doing on purpose is pretty hilarious too. I love getting mocked by people and told to “just spit it out”. Right. Let me just get on that…
Anyway, this whole vent started with my call the that police station. I couldn’t get the word “fingerprints” out, and ended up having to force it out. It’s just so shitty. And then the lady on the other side sounded annoyed with me.
I just hope I don’t get fired for something like this.
Somewhat unrelated, but I *love* this interview with Colin Firth about his role in The King’s Speech.